By Kara Ruffin
In November 2021 I was contacted by Ann Comfort and asked if I would like to co-lead a team of Westminster volunteers to help resettle two families from Afghanistan. I was on a welcoming team in March of 2020 when covid hit and was saddened by the loss of opportunity to serve our resettled brothers and sisters. After many months of being isolated due to Covid-19, I gladly accepted Ann’s offer and was thrilled to lead with a long-time friend, Jennifer Kerr-Stevens. Jennifer had a great deal of experience working with refugees and was still incredibly connected with one of the families she had supported in the past.
As we began our search for a team of volunteers, we knew people that could contribute financially, those that could donate household items, people to set up apartments for these families, those who could help provide meals and stock their pantries, etc. I remember feeling a bit overwhelmed at the thought of trying to prepare for two families that were likely in the US already but that we knew nothing about. How would we find housing in a crazy rental market that was overpriced and difficult, to say the least? Did they have children? Did they speak any English? How would we communicate with them? How could we begin to understand their needs, physically and emotionally? How could we best support our Afghan friends who had been through more than we could imagine?
After much anticipation, Church World Services (CWS) contacted us to let us know that they had paired us with two families that were living in a hotel and Airbnb in Greensboro. By this time, we had a group of approximately 20 WPC volunteers that made up our Afghan CoSponsor Team. We had meetings prior to this trying to prepare for the needs of our families and assigning responsibilities to each team member. Jennifer and I are planners and we wanted to be fully prepared for what was to come. In retrospect, I know that there was a “plan” that was much greater and more thought-out than anything our human selves ever could have imagined!
With Christmas quickly approaching, we set up two apartments that were very close to one another. One for a family of five (two parents and three children) and the other for a family of three with a new addition expected in April. We learned that these two families were related to one another and had gone through unimaginable circumstances prior to arriving in Greensboro. They had watched the Taliban kill friends and family and were so terrified for their lives that they were willing to leave behind everything they had ever known. One family was even forced to leave behind seven of their children. For three months they had been living in tents on a New Mexico military base. They recounted being sad and scared but emphasized an overwhelming feeling of gratitude to be in the United States and to be supported by our team.
I naively believed that getting them set up in their new apartments during the holiday season would be one of the most difficult aspects of our responsibilities. I could not have been more wrong! Our team came together and using most of the items that were donated, we were able to put together two nice and comfortable apartments. There was definitely a lot of trial and error as we attempted to prepare their space to best suit their families. Our team worked hard to create an environment we would want to live in, not just something that was better than their previous living conditions. To this day I am not sure that their microwaves have ever warmed a dish or that my lessons on how to use the vacuum were put to good use. Comforting children that are terrified of the sound that comes out of those upright sucking machines is very difficult, especially when the language barrier is so great.
For me, the most exciting and life changing aspect of this experience began in the days following our families moving into their new homes. We were contacted by the case worker at CWS and asked to sponsor another family made up of three adult men and a 15-year-old adolescent. They were already in an apartment but needed help financially and support as they assimilated to life here in Greensboro. Although Jennifer and I were not sure initially if our budget would allow for the addition of one more family, we were able to make it work. Perhaps even more amazing was what was happening within our team. When we began working together, many of us knew very little if anything about each other. There was little doubt that we could work together to get the basics done but, in the months to come it became apparent that we were each put on this team for a specific purpose.
I am brought to tears as I try to capture in words what happened internally within our team of volunteers. The best way to describe it is to imagine going to an abundant nursery where you see gorgeous perennials and annuals of all shapes, sizes, and colors. Each plant is unique and stunning in its own right but it is not until you group these plants together that you are able to fully experience their beauty. Our team was exactly this- a garden made up of wonderfully caring and compassionate individuals with unique talents and experiences, each of which was put on this team for a specific purpose way beyond anything Jennifer or I could have planned for. Clearly, God had created a blueprint greater and more thought-out than our Type A personalities could ever have created!
For each challenge we encountered or goal we hoped to achieve with our Afghan families, we had at least one team member who was well-equipped and willing to face the matter head-on. For example, our families had a lot of medical needs, but we just happened to have a retired nurse on our team who was very familiar with many of the medical concerns and the process of navigating a technical Medicaid system. Additionally, helping our families acquire the treatment they needed would not have been possible without the members of our team who were retired or had flexible schedules. Because of them, our families went to well over one hundred doctors’ appointments between January and May. Other volunteers were excellent at organizing and keeping up with electronic calendars which ensured that these appointments were easily managed. We had past educators on our team who took on the role of getting the children into school (for the first time!) and acted as a line of communication between the school and the parents. Some of our team members had a gift for being gentle and patient in teaching skills such as paying bills and making doctor’s appointments, while others took on a “sink or swim” approach, which can be a tough but necessary part of learning.
We were able to find employment for the men and a few of our team members took on the role of helping with interviews and filling out paperwork. One of our Afghan men was even able to obtain his driver’s license, and another will be getting his license in a couple of weeks, an important step toward independence. Two of our families have had cars donated to them and they are thrilled to no longer rely on the complicated busing system in Greensboro. Finally, after one of our adolescent family members became displaced, due to no fault of his own, two team members stepped up to provide him with a home and he is doing wonderfully. Our group is hopeful that this placement can continue and will provide him with a place to thrive.
This process also brought to light the connectedness and continuity of Christ. When we learned that one of our families had to be in Washington D.C. for a legal appointment, we were concerned how they would manage in such a big city by themselves and where we would get additional funds to cover the cost of the trip. One of our team members had previously lived in the DC area and was able to request help from her previous church. The church generously covered the costs of our family’s hotel and food during their trip. This blessing was only amplified when we learned that an active WPC member had recently moved to the DC area and lived a short distance from the hotel where our Afghan family was staying. She proved to be of great assistance in getting the family where they needed to be.
Our work with our Afghan families has been incredibly rewarding and exciting as we have begun to see them become more independent and capable of navigating their new home. While there have been days of great concern as we try to understand cultural differences and human differences, we find comfort in knowing that our efforts have done much more than just make the process of relocation easier. They have shown our Afghan brothers and sisters that they are welcome in our country and in our community, and as is often the case with giving to others, we have gained so much more than we have given. Our Afghan families have opened our hearts through their love, laughter, and the trust they have put in each of us. We are blessed and changed by this experience and are thankful for a team that was so perfectly planned by our creator.